I've been harming myself in so many different ways for as long as I can remember. Some of my earliest memories are of me harming myself, how fun. It's just something I've always done. I never realised it was self harm until a few years ago, but now when I think back to what I used to do, I recognise that it is self harm, but what shocks me is that no one noticed, and if they did, they only saw it happen once or twice. I guess I was always good at hiding it, even from the age of four.
With that in mind, I'm sure you can understand why keeping clean from self harm is a very difficult task for me. It's something I've always been able to do. So during those 250 days I had to learn to cope in different ways.
The first five or so months were awful, I really struggled to get through them and I was very close to giving up many times.
Lots of people speak to me and ask me how I've done it, and I don't know how I have. Most of the people who ask me only started self harming within the last year or two and I can't help but believe that it would be easier for them to stop than for me as they have known life before self harm and I have not. I know that some things are easy for some but difficult for others. But I guess what I'm trying to say is that if I can do it, anyone can.
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