Six months ago I made a life changing decision. It wasn't easy and, if I'm honest, I didn't completely want to. But I knew it needed to be done.
Half a year ago, I started my recovery. It was a huge step forwards for me but it wasn't easy. Before finally deciding to start it, I had been considering it for a long time but I knew I wasn't ready. When I eventually did start my recovery, I still didn't feel ready but I knew it needed to be done. I couldn't go on living the way I was. I needed to change and to fix myself if I wanted to survive and be happy.
To say that recovery has been easy so far would be a complete lie. I've been so low during the last six months that I honestly didn't think I'd ever get back up. But each and every time I managed to get back on my feet once again.
I've used the success of my eating disorder recovery to motivate me to keep trying. I started my eating disorder recovery a few months before I started to recover from everything else and I've shown myself it's possible to recover from that, so that keeps me going.
I have supportive friends who are there when I need them and who understand what I'm going through because I've told them everything. I told them because I needed them to know what was going on and what the reasons behind some of my behaviours were. They used to be concerned but now we don't even talk about it because they trust that I'm doing okay, and that if I'm not, I'll speak to them. I'm very thankful that they're there for me and that they've noticed a clear difference in how I've been in the last six months.
There have been times when I've wanted to give up, as lots of people already know. But no matter how close I've been to completely giving up, I still kept going. Not because I wanted to, but because I had to.
To anyone considering recovery, I really suggest that you give it a try. But give it a good try. Try it for at least three months. Three months may seem like a long time but things won't get better over time so you need to be willing to try if in the long term.
If I've learned anything over the last six months, it's that you need to learn to believe in yourself because you are so much stronger than you could ever imagine, and that taking care of your body and mind is one of the most important things you can do in life. You only get one body and one mind, so treat them well.
